Life Transitions

Parenting & Co-parenting

A difficult road

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Web Wisdom

Co-parenting is a post-divorce parenting arrangement in which both parents continue to jointly participate in their children's upbringing and activities. They make cooperative decisions on issues affecting their children and may both attend children's activities, and even family events.

They have to assume the joint responsibility of child rearing by making changes in their professional schedules, which are usually packed. Disputes: Some conflicting views may also arise between parents, which makes it difficult for kids to cope.

It can be highly difficult to build a harmonious and agreeable relationship after deciding to separate. Furthermore, sharing responsibilities, making child-first decisions, and accepting that parenting styles, home environments, and schedules may differ takes high levels of acceptance and communication.

The benifits of 50/50

Parents choosing shared custody generally want to achieve as close to a 50/50 time split as possible. At the same time, it can be important to consider how a schedule will affect the children's extracurricular activities, academic needs and social life.

Your Toolbox 2

How To Handle An Uncooperative Co-Parent Situations

Address Issues Early. ...

Set Emotional Boundaries. ...

Let Go of What You Can't Control. ...

Use Non-Combative Language. ...

Stick to Your Commitments. ...

Know Their / Your Triggers. ...

Encourage a Healthy Relationship with the Kids.

Avoid Direct Contact with the Uncooperative Co-Parent.

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Author's Opinion

Three fundamental co-parenting models:

Parallel parenting.

When two parents values are so fundamentally different you parallel parent. The parents do not work together, they avoid contact by limiting interactions.

Cooperative co-parenting.

Coparenting is definitely when 2 parents can problem-solve together in the best interest of the child. You take into account the other parent’s views and vice versa.

Conflicted co-parenting.

High levels of conflict for this group continue long after the divorce. Divorced parents are so focused on their arguments and disagreements that they are unable to parent together. Children often get caught in the middle of the conflict

7 Issues All Co-Parents Face And How To Overcome Them

Talking badly about the other parent. “When you put down their other parent, your children are likely to interpret it as a put-down of part of them. ...

Schedule changes. ...

Relinquishing control. ...

Uncooperative exes. ...

A lack of consistency. ...

Listening without judgement.

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Updated: November 2023

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