Coping
Emotional health
Core Happiness
Core happiness
Emotional health and managing your emotions effectively is crucial to your mental and physical wellness.
There are practices such as mindfulness or meditation that can help you stay focused on the present and bring awareness of feelings and emotions without judging them.
Core Happiness is a term developed by Dr Rangan Chatterjee and is explained more fully under Authors Opinion 2 in the next section.
It is essential to understand how this can benefit you on your journey to emotional wellness.
Handouts: Home Improvement: Men in Relationship Jan 2024 Adapted from David D Burns MD 1991
Five secrets of effective communication:
Empathy:
Find some truth in what the other person is saying, even if it seems totally unreasonable or unfair.
Put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to see the world through their eyes.
Paraphrase the other person’s words
Acknowledge how the other person is probably feeling, based on what she or he said.
Ask gentle , probing questions to learn more about what the other person is thinking and feeling.
Assertiveness:
Express your own ideas and feelings in a direct, tactful manner. Use “I feel” statements, such as”I feel upset” rather than “you” statements , such as “You’re wrong!” or “You’re making me furious!”
Respect:
Convey an attitude of respect, even if you feel frustrated or angry with the other person. Find something genuinely positive to say to the other person, even in the heat of the battle.
All it takes is 10 mindfull minutes
How emotionally are you?
Extract from: Owning our Struggles by Minaa B. 2023
Developing emotional maturity and resilience… And growing in the face of adversity
What does Emotional immaturity looks like?
Getting defensive in response to difficult conversations or being challenged - especially when you are challenged for the harm you caused
-Engaging in impulsive (sometimes destructive) behaviors
-Blaming others for your mistakes instead of taking responsibility
-Throwing tantrums and lashing out when you feel difficult emotions
-Making other people responsible for fixing your feelings
-Being unable to plan or commit to plans , people, or responsibilities
-Being unable to hear the needs of others
-Having a lack of desire to change or problem solve
-Expecting others to adjust , while making no effort to compromise
-Having a lack of self-awareness and personal agency
-Emotional maturity is developed through learning emotional intelligence- which is our ability to perceive, process, regulate, and manage our emotions in a healthy manner.
What does Building emotional maturity looks like?
-Learning to identify and name what you feel instead of pretending not to care or be un-bothered by things.
-Learning to manage your uncomfortable feelings instead of getting your feelings control you
-Learning to be an active listener with the intent to understand b (and not judge, defend, or deflect)
-Expressing your emotions in a healthy and respectful manner
-Thinking before you react
-Paying attention to triggers and body’s warning signs
-Feeling your emotions without judgment or shame
-Investigating the cause of your emotions
-Learning to take ownership of your choices and stop blaming people for your actions
Book: Happy Mind Happy Life - Dr Rangan Chatterjee 2022
What is Core Happiness?
-It's about moving your baseline level of happiness upwards so that you feel negative emotions less often, and for shorter bursts.
-It's about developing a resilient bubble of happiness around you that offers protection from the inevitable stresses and strains of life.
-It's about making sure your happiness is not overly dependent on other people or external events.
-It's about treating happiness as you'd treat your physical body, making it stronger with smart and effective regular practice.
So how does it work?
You can picture Core Happiness as a three-legged stool (chair). Each of the legs is separate, but essential. If one of them is knocked away, your feelings of happiness will probably collapse.
The first leg of the stool is contentment. Feeling content means being at peace with your life and your decisions.
The second leg is control. Being in control means that you feel able to make meaningful decisions and that nothing, within reason, has the power to overwhelm you.
The third leg is alignment. Feeling aligned means that the person you want to be, and the person you are actually being out there in the world, are one and the same. You are aligned when your inner values and your day-to-day actions match up.
The important thing to remember about Core Happiness is that it isn't a final destination you’ll one day reach and that everything will just be pure joy forever.
*This is a journey. *
The three legged stool does not stay upright all the time for anyone. Some days will be better than other days.
But with regular practice, your Core Happiness stool will certainly become more stable.
If you want bigger muscles, you've got to do resistance training regularly. Core Happiness works the same way. You must feed the part of you that you want to grow.
The stronger your Core Happiness is, the closer you'll move to being that happy, carefree person you once were.
ABCDE model of emotions
Action happend,
we have a belief
Then Emotional consequences
Decide what to do
and it always has an Effect
Disclaimer:
This website is for information only. It represents the unproven opinions / thoughts of various authors or collaborating partners.
This website and its content is not intended to serve as a substitute for professional medical or counselling advice.
BigJakeConnect Society and/ or associate organizations specifically disclaim any and all liability contained in or linked to this website.
A health-care professional should be consulted regarding your specific medical condition.
If you have a medical, mental health or other emergency, then reach out to the local emergency services helpline or hospital.
Copyright:
The contents of this website is subject to licencing and copyright. All rights reserved.
All webpages and all artwork has been minted as NFTs for exclusive use by BigJakeConnect Society and/ or their representatives.
No part of this website or content may be used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of BigJakeConnect Society and/ or their representatives, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in articles or reviews.
Updated: November 2023
Related Topics
Find Other Topics
General Information
Trending TopicsFind a category...
BJC start here Connecting Ready or Not? Our Struggles Coping Self-Reflection 7 Principles of living Conflict Life Transitions Mental Wellness Development Inner Exploration Personal Growth Community Taking Action Programs BigJakeConnect Book Resources YouTube Links General Book Resources BigJakeConnect Society ContactFind a topic...
Parenting & Co-parenting Love Site information Accountability Collective wisdom Communication Criticism Death Defensiveness Feelings Framing Friends Jealousy Life {love} bites Meditation Re-invention Relationships Secrets & lies Self-care tools The foundation Your story Alone Anger management Boundaries Change Contempt Denial Divorce Failure Friends help friends Inter-dependence Kindness Life's Journey Loneliness Respect Self-determination Smile More Triggers Vulnerability Bargaining Change Step 1 Compassion Conflict management Courage Depression Difficult decisions Emotional Pain Gratitude Habits Hubris Imagining Immigration Mediation New Beginnings Real men do cry Spirituality Stonewalling Stuck The BigJake guy Vacation time Abuse / hurting Acceptance Addictions Change Step 2 Community Control Culture Curiosity Disappointment Exploring Fear Honesty / trust Local Dads Men's Health Matters Pride Responsibility Separation Success Treasures Beliefs Brainstorming Change Step 3 Grief Guilt vs Shame Happiness Hope Humility Identity Mastering Plan ahead Power Relationship Pies Resilience Self - love Self-management Storytelling Team Activity AI Belonging Change Step 4 Emotional health Forgiveness Goals Healing Home Improvement Justice vs Truth Listening Motivation Next steps Normalizing Older adults Our Art Collection Playing Purpose Regret Sex & Dating (again) Society Services Values & strengths Empathy Shock Stress / Anxiety VolunteeringConnect Locally
Featured Services
Archway Community Services
BigJake hopes to connect all our local communities, programs and services.
Click here to log in to the service provider members dashboard.
Log InIf you are a service provider and would like to register and manage your service, click here to create a membership account.
Create Account